Do you like lists of things? Then you just might like the 99 Most Bizarre Self Inflicted Injuries! I’m fortunate to be eating dinner during this viewing. That should be pleasant.
This show contains dramatizations. It also has people on skateboards. This should be grand. Except for the insane pace of 99 items in one hour.
The first eight had to do with losing toes and fingers. The dramatization of an airhead getting her toes cut off by a door was fantastic. Evil Dead amounts of blood came out from under the door. It made me happy.
Number nine, looking in the gas tank with a lighter. It exploded, it was thrown at the forklift, the forklift exploded. You don’t expect forklifts to explode.
Power tools! A nail gun deflected a nail at a workerâ€™s head. It went through his head and curved up towards his eye. Yowza. Another fellow had a nail in his brain.
Cement mixer! This is my kind of list show. This bloke, everyone seems British, fell into a cement mixer.
Who would imagine that a sword swallower might run into trouble? Especially with five swords at once. He pierced his stomach lining. Did he learn his lesson? No. He will continue to swallow swords.
Sports injuries blah blah blah. Forget about that. We’re on to “explosion and fire.” Pulling a prank, an industrial sized firework blew up in somebody’s car. The smart man’s sandals were melted to his feet. Wow! He’s ready for the beach anytime you want!
Now we have a fire eater getting injured. He didn’t get injured eating fire though. He put some of his special eating fuel on the wood in his fireplace. Kaboom!
Trying to burn a snake is one of the injuries? They’re lucky it wasn’t on a plane.
This girl has been in over 25 car accidents in 6 years. All her fault. Why do these people get to live? Seriously, if you have 25 car accidents, you should have your ovaries taken away, let alone your license.
Lots of people get injured by chasing cheese that is going 70 miles per hour down a grassy hill. I guess there is something stupider than getting into 25 car accidents.
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